Learn how to forgive

In my course of building resilience, I am reminded that sometimes a good way to release the anxiety is learning to forgive. The steps are : 1) Write down your feelings, 2) Release your feelings, 3) Meditate, and 4) Talk to someone.

As I step into a year, exactly, a year since the point of departure. I have frequently reflect on that moment of pain. When I feel entitled and I want to uphold my own value of integrity, but feeling like a victim. When I receive a gift that I didn't want, I rejected that as I was in the moment of anger, and grief, unexpressed. I often reflect back and blame myself for doing certain things. But I wish I can forgive myself more than being rigid. Even today, I regret of hurting other's feeling and not recognizing that my action might have pushed others away. I was hurt, lonely, hungry, and sad.

When a normal human being was subjected to that feeling of hurt combined with loneliness, the sadness overwhelmed, and coupled with feeling of anger and helplessness, it is normal to be not at my best behavior. I now recognize that it is normal. I am a human. And I am more importantly, normal human being.

I want to be with people who can accept me for who I am. When I am normal, at my best, and when I am not at my best.